“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” (Matthew 6:34)
I grew up very spoiled by my grandma. We were not very well off, yet whenever I wanted anything, it was given to me right away.
Moving to the United States was not easy for me. Later, in order to find a better place to raise my son, I kept moving from place to place. Every time we moved, we had to pay the material price. It made me feel quite insecure. To fill that emptiness in my soul, I searched for more material possessions. I depended on money and wealth for security and self-confidence. As an example, I stocked up on enough food at home to last for over a month, and I bought enough of items like toothpaste or shampoo to easily last more than six months. This was how I chased after security.
A couple years ago, my house was robbed. All my cash and jewelry at home was taken. I grieved so badly over my loss. Then my life became very desperate. To try to protect what was left, I carried many remaining belongings with me everywhere. I did not feel comfortable leaving stuff in the car when I went shopping, but sometimes it was too bulky to put in my purse. I ended up hiding things in different places. I was so careful to hide my possessions that eventually I could not find some of them anymore. One day, around two in the morning, I found myself opening wardrobes and drawers in search of my silver and gold. Then I started to realize that I was totally enslaved to material objects.
Today my stuff is still hidden in the same places, but my heart is different. I am not worried about the silver and gold anymore. I have learned to turn my eyes to God, who grows the flowers of the field and feeds the sparrows.
What is your security based on? Do you depend on silver and gold, or on the Lord who provides for us on a daily basis?
Written by Cindy Eng. Artwork by Carol Li